"My Story" - Keamon S.

This story is shared anonymously to protect peace, privacy, and healing.

How would you describe your adoption? 

My story is somewhat unique because I was adopted by my aunt and uncle when I was 7 or 8 years old. Until then, I moved back and forth between their home and my biological mother’s. At the time, I felt both confused and relieved, as living with my aunt and uncle seemed more stable. Over time, however, I began to feel abandoned and struggled with the sense that I was loved but not fully wanted. I could not understand why I was adopted by my aunt and uncle instead of remaining with my biological mother. I still visited my biological mother occasionally and watched her have more children. Because my visits were brief and infrequent, I did not build a close relationship with my siblings until I was much older. It took me years to fully understand and accept my adoption. Without a clear explanation for why it happened or what it meant for my future, the experience strained many of my relationships with my biological family and contributed to identity struggles that remain with me today.

Where are you in your adoption journey today?

I’m comfortable with where I am in life when it comes to my adoption. However, my relationship with my biological mother is still not as close as it might have been. My siblings have started asking why I did not grow up with them, and over the past 10 years we have grown closer despite knowing little about our shared history. I am also a very private person and often struggle to form close relationships because I worry they will not last, so I tend to hold back.

One thing my younger self needed to hear was...

... that I was not the cause of this situation. I had done nothing wrong, and I was loved, valued, and cared for. I also wish there had been more open conversation about why the adoption happened and more clarity from the people around me about the past, present, and future.